Sad news. Well, for me anyway. 

I had my tarot cards read today with my friend Katy and, well, apparently my chakra is completely closed. 

I took this simple test that confirmed … yes … computers and physics alike believe my soul is black and nearing being black for forever. 

I could tell something was off with me but this? Really? 

I began reading the simple explanations this website had to offer me. Explanations like - 

- Your partners are often wrong and incompatible for you, and you find yourself wondering if you’ll ever find “the one”.

- You tend to struggle with self-esteem issues, and feelings of unworthiness. 

- You tend to sabotage your relationships with distrust, anger, and a sense that you’ll lose your independence if you rely too much on others.

For me it’s so confusing. Everything seems to come so easy to me except for relationships and my relationship with myself. But I just always thought if I was aware of this and took notice and tried to improve my imperfections I would become a better person. Apparently, that’s the one thing you’re not supposed to do as it leads to a swirling back and forth within yourself leading to complete unbalance within and projecting out to others. 

I don’t know where to go from here. 

All the options before me seem pointless and endless. Nothing seems like an answer. I’m a lost tortured soul. I want to say and it feels like no one cares but this fits under my Personal Power Chakra 

- You feel like a victim in the world.

And here I am writing this short sad story bringing your soul down with mine huh dear Tumblr reader?

Well, I don’t know much more to say or to share. 

I am blank.